Welcome to Day 3:

Trust in love is a tricky kind of trust.

But it's not always about what others have done to you.

As Brene Brown said, 

The ways you are hard on yourself...those are the greatest obstacles between your trust...and your love.

Click the play button at the very top...

...to begin Day 3.

Enjoy...
David Romanelli

--For the transcription of today's meditation--

This week we're defining trust because trust means something different to everyone. Today, trust in love, very tricky. Trust in love. 

There are times where you might have been through a lot of difficult circumstances and you question if it's really worth trusting in love. Especially if you've been burned in love.

There are times where you're angry and it's easier to trust in ego and pride than it is to let down your guard and let love rule. The Dalai Lama said, "The rarest form of human strength is the ability to open your heart when you're really mad."

And there are times where you're so busy and so distracted that love is on the back burner. It's like an afterthought. And it takes some kind of tragic or dire situation to wake up and remember how important love is. 

How do you get back to feeling maximum love in your life and trusting love as a guiding force? The key, and you've heard this a million times, it starts with the relationship you have with yourself.

There's a lot of self doubt, a lot of self criticism. 

I saw a great quote the other day by Brene Brown, "I belong everywhere I go, no matter where I am or who I am with, as long as I don't betray myself, I belong to myself." 

Let me repeat that. "I belong everywhere I go. No matter where I am or who I'm with, as long as I don't betray myself, I belong to myself."

So what does that mean to betray yourself? 

When you're going through something intense and you just make it harder on yourself, you wonder how you could have made a better choice in the past. You bury your head in what's not working and your mistakes and your regrets. That's betraying yourself. I mean, what good does regret do for you? 

Just to share a personal story. When the economy was really bad in 2008... I was teaching yoga workshops and it was brutal. I really struggled during that time. I had to walk away from the condo I owned in LA. I totally lost my swagger. I was unsure how to support myself. It was emasculating...to say the least.

Even now, I have regrets sometimes about walking away from that condo because it would be worth so much in 2020 and I think to myself, why didn't I hustle to just figure that out? But when I'm thinking like that, that is betraying myself. The healing action is to recognize how much I grew during the great recession, how much I learned.

As one elder said, she loved and lost multiple times in her life. She earned money and lost it all multiple times. She said, "It's the nature of a good life, that love, money, energy, comes and goes and comes again.  Hang in there. 

Question for you. How have you betrayed yourself? How are you currently betraying yourself?
 
I'm guessing many of you listening can relate to this in matters of your career and getting down on yourself... in matters of health and not treating yourself kindly... in matters of your inner dialogue and how you think about yourself. 

Meditation is one of the most healing things you can possibly do for the relationship you have with yourself.

To step away from the world and take a moment to feel good about who you are and where you're at. To be kind and compassionate for what you've been through and what you're going through.

And especially if you've had really hard times lately. This practice of self love is the most important thing you can possibly do for yourself.

One time I heard a meditation by Jack Kornfield. It was a loving kindness meditation directed toward yourself, and I was absolutely bawling my eyes out. I mean, wow. To clear the air about the grievances that you have with yourself. Fucking powerful. Excuse my Sanskrit. It's absolutely the essential first step to healing.

Start here. Take a moment to get a little more comfortable. Settle in. Put your right hand on your belly and your left hand on your heart. Again, put your right hand on your belly and your left hand on your heart. 

You may have heard of the loving kindness mantra. Today we're going to direct loving kindness back toward your own self.

So just begin with a few deep breaths..

and I want you to imagine a person who loves you the most and see yourself through their eyes. What would this person who loves you the most...what would they wish for you?

And with your right hand on your belly and your left hand on your heart. Repeat these phrases. 

May I be filled with love.

May I be safe and protected.

May I be healthy and strong.

May I be at peace.

Breathe gently with these phrases as you plant the seeds of loving kindness. Again, repeating after me. 

May I be filled with loving kindness.

May I be safe and protected.

May I be healed and strong.

May I live with ease and a free heart.

And just feeling compassion for your struggles and your sorrow, compassion for the pain that you've carried,

And let these phrases be like the healing touch of a master healer. Again, repeating after me. 
 
May I be filled with loving kindness.

May I be held in great loving kindness.

May I be safe and protected.

Just feeling the safety and protection that is possible for you. The Buddha talked about a mother holding her most beloved child. That's the idea here. To treasure yourself, to hold yourself with compassion

and keeping your right hand on your belly and your left hand on your heart. We're going to inhale through the right hand on the belly. Exhale through the left hand on the heart. inhale through the right hand on the belly. Exhale through the left hand on the heart.

Let the breath move love through you. Let the breath move through your resistance.... through your pain. Let it feel good.

for just a few minutes. I will leave you to relax, to breathe, to meditate. If your attention wanders off, inhale thru the right hand on the belly. Exhale through the left hand on the heart. Inhale thru the right hand on the belly. Exhale through the left hand on the heart. in just a few minutes I'll be back.

--meditation begins--

--meditation ends--

coming back to the moment.

to trust in love. When you really think about that, it's tricky because maybe you've been burned in a relationship or maybe you have some anger and surrender eludes you, or maybe you put love on the back burner. 

So the healing and the trust happens in the way you treat yourself.  Start there. It has to start there.

Loving kindness for yourself.

as you move into your day. In those moments where you're self critical, self doubting, insecure, come back to those words. 

May I be held in great loving kindness.

may I be filled with loving kindness.

May I be held in great loving kindness. 

May I be filled with loving kindness.

I'll see you tomorrow. Peace.